How Men Can Help Close the Gender Gap in Household Chores

While we embrace modern equality in many ways, the division of housework remains stubbornly unequal. Men are often raised to be disconnected from domestic duties, so women end up managing the vast majority of chores. This includes both the physical tasks and the constant "mental load" of running a home—a responsibility that persists even when they have their own careers.

But here’s the part we don’t talk about enough: this isn’t just an issue between partners. Every man in a household—be it a father, son, brother, or grandfather—has a role to play in closing the housework gap. Let’s break down all of it and see what men can do to help.

The Hidden Cost of Domestic Inequality

Numerous studies have found that women, globally, spend far more time than men on unpaid housework. According to the UN, women do about 2.6 times more unpaid care and domestic work than men. This imbalance affects everything from women's health and stress levels to career opportunities.

And still, many men believe they are “helping out” more than ever before. But "helping out" isn’t enough when the core ownership of household labor still defaults to women. Equality at home doesn’t come from occasional gestures—it comes from shared responsibility.

Why It's Everyone’s Job—Not Just the Females

A clean and a home that functions well is not a “female domain.” It’s a shared space, and maintaining it is a shared duty. When we expand this mindset beyond just romantic couples, we bring sons, brothers, and older men into the conversation. Because everyone is a part of the home and has a responsibility to contribute, no matter how. 

Here's what that mindset shift looks like:

• “It’s not my mess” becomes “It’s my space too.”

• “Tell me what to do” becomes “What needs doing, and how can I take full responsibility for it?”

• “I’m helping her” becomes “I’m contributing to our shared home.”

  
  

Practical Ways Men Can Take On More

Men, with their lazy nature, can do a lot here to share the equal burden of housework. No one likes vague advice. So, here are concrete ways how all men in a household can reduce the gender gap in housework—starting today.

1. Take Full Ownership of Key Chores

Instead of waiting to be assigned, volunteer to take over recurring tasks. Choose one or two areas and own them completely.

• Laundry (wash, fold, put away)

• Daily kitchen cleaning (after breakfast/dinner)

• Bathroom maintenance (weekly scrub-downs). Follow this bathroom cleaning checklist for a systematic approach

• Garbage and recycling (not just taking it out—managing the schedule and sorting)

• Weekly fridge clean-out.

  
  

2. Learn the Right Way—Then Teach Others

Don’t rely on others (especially women) to tell you what to do. If there's a chore that needs to be done, do it and complete it yourself. Use online guides or professional standards if needed to learn how to do things properly. Keep in mind that- 

• Vacuuming isn't just “pushing it around”—learn about edges, patterns, and filters.

• Wiping counters? Use the right products for surfaces—avoid smearing germs.

• Folding isn’t optional—neatly folded laundry saves space and reduces stress.

  
  

Tip: Turn tasks into habits with digital reminders or chore-tracking apps. Make it systematic, not situational.

3. Anticipate, Don’t Wait

This is where the real shift happens. Women carry the mental load—remembering, planning, and anticipating the home’s needs. Men can share this burden too.

• Notice when soap runs low and restock without being told.

• Add items to the grocery list when you use the last of something

• Plan one family meal a week—from shopping to cleanup.

  
  

How men of every age can get involved in housekeeping routines

The homes that function best cultivate a culture of shared responsibility within their minds every moment. When the chores are shared, you don’t have to tell the members what to do. Once the burdens are shared, the house just automatically functions. Here’s how men at every age level can get involved, based on professional-level housekeeping routines:

For Fathers & Older Men

Set the standard and be the role model for the younger boys at home. With all the chores you take up your sleeves, you show others that care is everyone’s responsibility.

• Clean the plates after meals

• Keep your own wardrobe in order

• Manage household repairs

• Share the responsibility of shopping for groceries with your partner

• Manage outdoor tasks like- removing roof moss to prevent long-term damage.

• Schedule and oversee monthly deep-cleans (fridge, baseboards, ceiling fans).

• Be the one to coordinate seasonal tasks like organizing the garage or cleaning windows

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For Teenage Boys & College-Age Men

It’s not “babysitting” or “helping mom.” It’s your home too. So you should-

• Clean your own room fully once a week.

• Take turns with siblings doing shared chores (vacuuming, pet care, bathroom wipes).

• Learn to cook a simple dinner once a week.

  
  

For Adult Sons Living at Home

Don't fall into the “guest” mindset. Be a full participant in the household rhythm.

• Take the trash out of the house

• Manage a zone (e.g., living room or kitchen) and keep it consistently clean.

• Offer to do shared laundry (towels, mats, etc.).

• Handle utility bill tracking, minor fixes, or tech setup.

  
  

A clean home doesn’t come from one person working overtime. It comes from everyone doing their part, week after week. And that’s true equality.

Red Flags: What Not to Do

Even with good intentions, these behaviors keep inequality alive:

• Waiting until the mess is unbearable

• Dismissing small chores as “not important”

• Doing it halfway to get out of future responsibility (also called weaponized incompetence)

• Expecting praise or gratitude for normal contributions (do it for the family)

Final Thoughts

Gender equality doesn’t begin and end in offices or on paper. It starts at our very homes, in the small moments that we live by every other day, but don’t see the details. Like noticing the crumbs, picking up the wet towel, scrubbing the sink, or cleaning the mirror. But the divide in domestic labor isn’t just inconvenient—it’s unfair, unsustainable, and deeply ingrained.

That’s why men, of all ages, should stop “helping” and start owning up to completely eradicate this imbalance and give relief to the women of the household. A home is not just a place to live—it’s a shared responsibility. And equality starts by picking up the broom.